Let’s admit it:
The worst part about being in a long term relationship is that sex gets boring.
I know what it’s like to go through the “honeymoon period.” When you first meet, everything you do is magical. It doesn’t matter if she farts in bed, you’re still absolutely crazy about her, and the sex is on fire.
Sometime later (could be weeks, could be months), you hit a wall. Suddenly, sex becomes a chore.
Even worse, it could stop altogether.
My married friends and I talk about this all the time. It’s sad to see how many couples stop having sex, only to start fighting (or get divorced) down the road.
I believe…if you keep having electrifying sex with your partner, you can deal with any relationship problems.
This is why I take what I learned from my career in the porn industry, and apply it to my wife.
Here’s the top 9 techniques I use to keep sex with my wife mind-blowing.
#1 – Take it Outside the Ring
Think about the last 10 times you had sex. Let me guess, they were all in the same place…your bed.
The same old bed you and your wife have shared for the past 10 years. Through the fights and forgiveness, the bed has been there for you.
Some of the spiciest sex I’ve ever had has been inside my house, but not on my bed.
I suggest having sex somewhere besides the bed.
Even if you do all of the same techniques and moves you’ve done for decades, having sex on something else will add an exciting novelty factor.
Some good places are the closest, the living room couch, or on the stairwell.
Hands down the best place to have sex is the kitchen. Enjoy a nice meal together, then while she’s doing the dishes, come up from behind, grab her booty, kiss her neck, and get the counter dirty.
Bonus points if you make it spontaneous. Wait until the kids are gone, and make her remember why you’re her man.
#2 – Assume the Position
When I talk to couples about sex, they say they’re all in the same routine:
MAYBE some Doggystyle
And that’s IT
Between where you put your arms, legs, body, and dick, to where she puts hers, there are literally infinite possibilities of sex position. I’m not going into all the details, but for starters, try adding in any new position. You might find that this one drives her wild, and she’s been waiting for you to switch it up.
Spoons – lie down like you’re spooning and enter her from behind. This might feel clumsy at first, but it’s worth it. This allows maximum G spot stimulation for her, but lets you relax so you can last longer.
Rear Entry Standing – Bend her over the bed, kitchen sink, or couch and go to town. Women love this, but men don’t take the time to remember to do this.
Mastery – this one is here you sit up with your feet on the ground, but she has her feet on the bed riding you. Great for intimacy and deep penetration.
If you’d like to learn more, this website has gifs of every position imaginable: (NSFW)
#3 – Bring in the Reinforcements
No, don’t bring another guy in.
I’m talking about sex toys. The most common being dildos and vibrators.
You can use toys during foreplay to warm her up and get her to orgasm, or take sex to the next level by providing additional stimulation while you’re inside of her.
Start by getting a vibrating cock ring. Put it on and see if she likes how it rocks against her clit. Odds are, she’ll love the stimulation and beg you to wear it more.
Next, go to a sex shop together and buy for something she likes. A professional vibrator, a special dildo, or a magic hitachi wand…tell her Christmas came early.
She’ll love it, I guarantee.
#4 – Take a Detour
Anal is not just something for weirdos and pornstars.
Anal sex is not something you bring up spontaneously. You should discuss this with your partner, so she can prepare in advance, mentally and physically.
First, while you’re at the sex store buying a vibrator, also pick up a butt plug. Put this into her while you’re having sex so she gets used to the feeling.
After a while, she’ll be ready to take your whole cock (depending on how big you are).
Slap on PLENTY of lube (I prefer coconut oil) and dive in. Have fun!
#5 – Buy Some New Furniture
No, don’t go to the furniture store and start buying a new couch. I’m talking about a sex pillow.
These triangular pillows allow you to get better entry.
These are AMAZING for missionary. Use it to raise her butt up, so you can hit her G Spot.
You can also use it for doggystyle, supporting her body so she doesn’t get tired.
You can buy one at the sex store or buy a less expensive one on Amazon by searching for “foam wedge pillow.” People use them after surgery.
#6 – Play the Part
Do some Role Play. You don’t have to get crazy and do some teacher/student scenario, but if you pretend to be someone else, it lets you and her out of your comfort zones.
Here’s a script that will drive her crazy….
- Book a babysitter
- Book a nice hotel room
- Dress up very nice
- Tell her to go sit at the bar
- Wait 10-15 minutes, walk up, order a drink
- Introduce yourself to her as a completely different person. You and her should have fake personas. You can be a secret agent, she can be a model, whatever. As long as you’re NOT the same couple you were hours earlier.
- Seduce her, take her to your hotel room, and have your way with her.
The sitcom Modern Family did something similar and although hilarious, this does work like a charm.
#7 – Explore Your Dominant Side
Introduce some light BDSM into your sex life. It doesn’t have to be full on leather outfits and bull whip, but a little rope goes a long way.
After all, there is a reason 50 Shades of Grey sold 100 million copies, right?
Just like a lot of things on this list, start slow and increase intensity as you get more comfortable.
Buy some real cop handcuffs ($10 on amazon), and throw them on her while you’re having sex.
(Bonus points if you text her a picture of them before use)
Increase the intensity by adding in under-the-bed restraints, blindfolds, gag balls, tape, rope, whatever.
Women like being tied up, so give them what they want!
#8 – Take Your Time
Start practicing “karezza.” Karezza is a type of tantric sex that involves long, deep strokes, and no orgasm.
Yes you heard me right, no orgasm. The tantra people claim you lose your life energy when you orgasm, so you should just stick with all the other parts of sex…
I don’t really believe that, but there is value in karezza. Karezza offers an opportunity for contrast.
One day you should pound her brains out. The next, take it nice and slow, and light up the passionate fire under her again.
Considering some women take a long time to orgasm, this is a great way to find her orgasm zones.
#9 – Public Sex
Like we discussed before, having sex in bed gets boring.
To really spice things up, have sex in public.
This sounds risky, and I know what you’re thinking…”won’t somebody see”
The answer is…”that’s the point!” There’s a certain danger in the possibility of getting caught, which turns into excitement.
The first place to try is in your car, just like in high school. Scope out a good spot with a dimly lit parking spot, hop in the backseat, and have her ride you like a pony.
Other great public places to have sex:
Shopping mall – changing room
Park – Go hiking or just find a bunch of trees
Bathrooms – at a restaurant, football stadium, wherever there are people. The riskier the better.
Whew, that was pretty hot.
On one final note – If you’ve been struggling to please your woman in bed, you might want to check out The Best She Ever Had Online Academy. If you’re interested in building a stronger relationship (and a hotter sex life), then this might be the program for you. It’s the ultimate guide on how to become a sex god.