Wait…what?
Isn’t the whole point of orgasm to blow a huge load on your partner?
That’s exactly what I thought the first time I heard the phrase “dry orgasm.” After filming hours (probably days or weeks) of porn scenes, I’d never encountered a “dry orgasm,” so it had to be BS…
Then, I started experimenting and found that dry orgasms are amazing. Once learned, dry orgasm gives you the spine-tingling, earth-shattering sensation of orgasm without having to ejaculate.
Why Would I Want To Do That?
Great question.
The benefit of dry orgasm is that since you aren’t ejaculating, you can continue to have sex after the orgasm.
Even I, who’s able to go multiple rounds of sex, still have to wait for the “refractory period” to pass so I can get the second round of sex going.
Dry orgasm fixes that.
A successful dry orgasm will allow you to continue having sex without waiting. Your boner won’t go away. You’ll stay completely erect, ready to continue having sex.
Now, remember how powerful your last orgasm was. How amazing it felt…like a drug. Imagine if you could reach that same high two or three times a night, wouldn’t that be awesome? That’s where dry orgasm comes into play.
Dry orgasm is the skill needed to bring you to multiple orgasms.
Pre-Orgasm Checklist
In order to properly learn to dry orgasm, you have to master a few skills first. Those skills are kegels and edging.
Kegels are exercises that train the muscles around your penis.
You see, the point of dry orgasm is to orgasm but remove ejaculation from the equation. The way you do this is by SQUEEEEEZING the muscles around your penis (the kegel muscles) in order to throttle the urethra, preventing ejaculation.
Seems simple enough. BUT the problem here is that you can’t kegel the entire time you’re having sex. That would be insanely painful and require Arnold Schwarzenegger-sized muscles.
To fix this, you need to get more in touch with your body to learn when you’re going to orgasm. Most men just have sex and when they come…they come. That’s it.
Men don’t pay attention to their arousal levels enough to prevent orgasms. If we did, all of us would last 30 minutes in bed!
The solution is to practice edging.
Edging is the ultimate exercise to lasting longer. It works by getting in touch with your body. You practice edging by masturbating right up to the point of no return, then stopping, and repeating for time.
The point of no return is the phrase for “that moment when you lose control of your arousal and cum all over the place.” Also known as when you’re about to come, so you tell your woman, “I’m gonna come.”
For more details, make sure you check out what I wrote in Edging 101.
Now that we’ve got the right tools, let’s learn how to dry orgasm.
How To Dry Orgasm – Step By Step
Finally, let’s break down the exact steps required to achieve a dry orgasm.
Step 1 – Have sex, or start masturbating. I recommend learning to dry orgasm by yourself before you try to do this with your wife or girlfriend.
Dry orgasming is harder to accomplish during sex because the sensation is so much more intense than masturbation. To minimize this, use positions that will help you last longer like cowgirl and spoons, so you can better regulate your arousal.
Step 2 – Keep thrusting until you get right to the point of no return (PONR).
As discussed in the part about edging, the PONR is when you can’t resist orgasm any longer. Take yourself right to the edge of the PONR, then head to step 3…
Step 3 – KEGEL extremely hard, like your life depends on it, to stop your orgasm. Pull out if you have to. Do whatever’s necessary in order to squeeze hard enough to stop ejaculation.
Step 4 – Once your arousal calms down, and you don’t feel like you’re at the PONR anymore…get back to having sex.
This step might take some training, to figure out how long you need to get back to having sex. For most, it’s within minutes.
While you let your arousal fall, take the time to be affectionate with your partner. Caress her body, stroke her hair, and bite her nipples. This will also distract you from your boner so you can calm down more.
That Seems Easy
The steps are simple, but the execution is difficult.
The problem with dry orgasm is that most men do not have the kegel strength or arousal intuition to properly time and perform the kegel while they’re orgasming.
It’s easy to write down, but hard to achieve.
For example, you could miss the PONR and forget to kegel, causing you to ejaculate. Or, you could recognize the PONR, but perform a weak kegel, so you ejaculate again.
It’s possible to have a half-orgasm, where your kegel is effective…but not strong enough to completely dry up your orgasm.
These are scenarios that you should get used to, and when you start practicing dry orgasm, you’ll start to see how common they are.
If you don’t perfectly get the dry orgasm, don’t worry. Keep practicing and it will improve over time.
And Then What…?
Dry orgasms are great, and once you master it, it’s a skill that stays for life. It lets you have multiple orgasms in multiple rounds, without dealing with a refractory period.
The problem with dry orgasms is that they only cut the amount of time between orgasms. It’s still likely that sex won’t last very long because…you can’t last very long.
Even if your refractory period is only seven seconds, it won’t mask the poor sexual performance that happens when you orgasm early.
Lasting longer in bed is hands down the best way to increase the pleasure for you and your partner. I’ve coached countless men from “one pump chumps” to “stallions” that whole-heartedly agree. Once you last longer in bed, the problems in your love life, marriage, relationship, and household… they all disappear.
Dry orgasm will help you have better sex, but it can only go so far.