A Guide to Intimate Lovemaking with the Yab Yum Position

A Guide to Intimate Lovemaking with the Yab Yum Position

The Yab Yum position can be one of the most romantic in the bedroom positions, allowing partners to improve emotional intimacy and interconnectedness.

The Yab Yum position focuses on a slow, mindful, and soulful connection between two bodies. In other words, it combines sex, synchronized breathing, and different movements to reach intense sensations and emotion-filled experiences that strengthen the bond between two lovers.

Understanding the basics of this Yab Yum position can help ignite passionate connections and create an exceptional experience!

This guide will teach you all you need to know about the Yab Yum sexual position and how to use it for intimate and amazing sex. 

Table of Contents

What Is the Yab Yum Sex Position?

The Yab Yum sex position is a tantric sex position designed to heighten the sexual energy between two lovers, as explained above.

In this position, the man sits with his legs crossed on the ground and his partner in his lap facing him. The woman wraps her legs around the man’s waist and her arms around his neck.

There’s deep eye and skin contact and an opportunity for slow, meaningful penetration. The angle of penetration can be adjusted depending on what works best for both partners.

The Yab Yum position offers a unique combination of physical and spiritual connection that can be missing in more traditional sexual positions such as the classic Missionary, Doggy Style, or even Cowgirl

Get step-by-step video instructions here

Yab Yum Position: Pros and Cons

The Yab Yum position has many benefits. It’s a great way to connect with your partner emotionally while having an enjoyable sexual experience.

On a spiritual level, the Yab Yum position helps balance the male and female energies within each partner, allowing them to connect with their true selves and become one.

Physically, the Yab Yum position can greatly pleasure both partners as it allows for deep penetration and closeness. The position is great for couples who want to explore sex outside physical motions. 

As with any sexual position, it is not for everyone. Here are the cons of the Yab Yum.

Before attempting this position, ensure that both partners are on the same page regarding expectations and boundaries.

How to Do the Yab Yum?

The Yab Yum is one of the easier Tantric sex positions to perform, making it accessible to most interested in trying it. 

To do the Yab Yum position, both partners should sit facing each other with their legs crossed. The female partner should then wrap her legs around his waist in a seated embrace. While the woman sits on her partner’s lap, she should continue to gaze into her partner’s eyes, take deep breaths with him, and rock back and forth or side to side.

How to Enhance the Position

There’s a bit more to Yab Yum than explained above, but you get the jist of it. If you want to take the position to the next level, understand that this is about more than penetration.


An intimate atmosphere will help most couples build sexual tension and feel the sexual energy flow from one another.

Build sexual intimacy by lighting candles, dimming the lights, and playing soft and uplifting music in the background. 


Poses like this one are always better with slow and gradual build-up. Take the time to start with sensual caresses and massages before moving on to this position. 

Try taking a sensual bath together where you explore each other’s bodies without penetration. Solely focus on enjoying the moment and being present with one another. 

Emotional Intimacy

To maximize your experience, keep eye contact with your partner. Maintaining this level of deep eye contact will create an opportunity for emotional growth.

Body Contact

Before penetration:

1.     Sit close, knee to knee, and gaze into each other’s eyes.

2.     Breathe together and look lovingly into one another.

3.     Slowly inch closer.

4.     Then, the female partner should sit on her partner’s lap with foreheads touching

Continue rocking rhythmically, gazing and breathing simultaneously. Don’t focus so much on the penetration aspect of this position. Just continue to focus on the moment to build that desired deeper connection.


One of the biggest complaints about this position is by the man, who has to bear his partner’s weight on his lap with his legs folded. It may be uncomfortable for some men to maintain the pose. To lessen the burden of your partner’s weight, put a pillow under yourself beforehand and use other props to lessen the strain on your lower back. 

Right Mind

You need to have the mindset of connectedness and bonding over physical sex to enjoy this position. Unlike Doggy Style, where the goal is to go hard and fast. This slow embrace may take significantly longer than your typical go-to sex positions.  

If you or she isn’t in the mood for slow, intimate embraces, then save this one for a later time. Likewise, if someone is in a hurry and on the clock, pencil it in your calendar for a later date. The goal is not to be rushed; there is nowhere to go and nowhere else you would rather be in a position like this. 

Other Unique Tantric Sex Positions

The Butterfly is another Tantric sex position that is quite common amongst couples. Unlike the Yab Yum, the Butterfly is a sexual position where the female partner lies on her back and the male partner enters from above while she keeps her legs spread wide as a butterfly would. 

This position allows for deep penetration, eye gazing, skin to skin contact, and more intimate connection. Still, it has the added benefit of being slightly more comfortable than Yab Yum for individuals with lower body issues. Remember, the focus is on connection over penetration. Go slow and focus on feeling your partner’s body while she feels yours. 


The Yab Yum position is an incredibly intimate and meaningful way to connect with your partner physically, mentally, and spiritually while you deepen the connection between you two and open new doors to communication.

It may take some practice to get it right, but the effort will certainly be worth it! If you feel like your sex life could use a spark of something new and exciting, why not give the Yab Yum a try?

Frequently Asked Questions

Most common Tantra practices are spiritual ones, not sex positions.

It’s all about connecting to your sexual energy and using it to get in touch with your partner on a deeper level. Think of it as an intense form of yoga with more pleasure and less bending.

Tantra is not the Kama Sutra, as some people believe. There’s too much to cover about Tantra in just an FAQ section of an article. If you’re interested in learning more, expect to find more than just sex positions and be introduced to a world of spiritual practices that date back to ancient India. 

“Yab Yum” is an ancient Sanskrit phrase that translates to “father-mother” and is believed to have originated in India centuries ago. 

The term references a male god’s intimate embrace with his female partner, representing the cosmic union of male and female energy. This same concept can be seen in other tantric sexual positions.

They are essentially the same, but one is the English name. The Lotus may or may not include all or any of the Tantric elements, and may focus on the physical aspects of the position only.

People with physical limitations can still practice the Yab Yum without any problems. Just make sure to take extra precautions and be aware of any potential issues that might arise.

Not really; just come with an open mind and be ready to take things slow and steady with your significant other.

Bringing a comfortable pillow might help. 

Yes! Clitoral stimulation can be achieved during this position. Depending on how you angle your body, the right places along the internal wall of the vagina can also be stimulated.

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