Let’s jump straight into the nitty-gritty. A fingering tutorial is not what you need if you want to pleasure your girlfriend or wife. In reality, most women do not enjoy being fingered unless you hit the G-Spot or any of her other spots deep inside her soft, wet, and inviting pussy.
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It’s not your fault. Porn has convinced you that women love getting finger-banged, so men worldwide treat their fingers like mini-dicks designed to thrust in and out until she climaxes.
You’ve wasted your time if you tried to get a woman to climax by finger-banging her. You need to level up, learn and love giving her a pussy massage. It’s super easy, so it’s a wonder it’s remained a mystery for this long. We guarantee your woman will go CRAZY if you set aside one night this week for a no-pressure, no-expectation, sit back and enjoy, pussy massage!
What is a Pussy Massage?
A pussy massage is what we’re known for at SQL. It’s more than fingering; it’s an appreciation of her entire body and vulva. Everything will get some love tonight — her curvy or slim waist, her sexy-ass thighs, and everything between her thighs. In short, a pussy massage is 1000x better than any fingering tutorial you can find on the internet.
What's wrong with fingering?
Fingering does not sound sexy or sensual. Imagine you’re with your woman. You tell her, “Babe, tonight I’m going to finger-bang you.” Does that sound appealing? Say the words out loud if you need to, but NO. It does not sound that great.
Now, say, “Babe, tonight I’m going to give you a pussy massage.” She might react in natural curiosity because I can guarantee you’re the first man to ever say that to her, or she might automatically say, “let’s do it!” because a pussy massage sounds relaxing and sensual AF.
Moreover, it sounds like a treat! How often do you get massages? Probably not too often; therefore, when you say you’re going to give her one, it will automatically be an unforgettable experience.
Wait, should I really not finger my girlfriend?
You came here looking for a fingering tutorial, so we’re not saying you should never finger your partner. If you can hit her spots and she enjoys it, why not? A pussy massage is just 1000x better, will leave her wetter, and hit several more spots!
Prepare for a Pussy Massage
To give a proper pussy massage, you have to set the scene. You do not rush through a pussy massage or do it in an uncomfortable location, such as the back of a parked car or on the sofa while the kids are upstairs.
Make the environment as relaxing and comfortable as possible. No distractions. Tell the kids to go to a friend’s house to play video games. Leave the cell phones outside of the bedroom and put them on Do Not Disturb mode. The next 30-60+ minutes are your and her time.
Take your time
It’s no mystery; a lot of ladies rush through sex. She’s probably thinking, “He’ll finger me for 1-5 minutes, then reach down and take out his cock. I’ll blow him, and we’ll move on to penetration.” She has the night already thought out in her head, not because that’s her ideal scenario, but because that is what usually happens each time you’re in bed together.
Break the cycle of rushed sex. Before you even get on the bed together, ensure her multiple times that there is nowhere to be, nothing to do, and no agenda for the evening — Yes, multiple times! She might not fully believe you the first two times, especially if she’s never had a man spoil her this way
Leave the expectations outside the bedroom
Tell her you do not expect anything in return, although if you master the pussy massage, you are nearly guaranteed to get something in return each time; the goal is no expectations, no plan, no goals — including no goal for making her orgasm X number of times. Orgasm is not the goal of sex! Fun, play and exploration are the three goals you should have in mind.
Get comfortable
Dim the lights, put on her favorite music or something calming, and light the candles. Ask her to lay on the bed, facing you, and put a pillow under her head and pelvis for added comfort. Spread her legs as wide as possible. Continually ask if she’s comfortable because some ladies are more flexible than others.
Kneel on your knees in front of her. Men with knee pain might find this position a little more comfortable. Instead of kneeling, sit with your legs spread out towards her head, and ask her to wrap her legs around you. For added comfort, ask her to lay on the end of the bed so you can use the headboard for back support.
Get ready
Pick up high-quality water-based lubricant for the genital area and some massage oil or extra light olive oil for the all-over body massage.
How to Give Her a Mind-Blowing Pussy Massage
Gently guide her to the bedroom and ask her to lay on her back and relax while you lube up your hands and fingers with massage oil or water-based lube. Slowly and lightly, rub your hands down her body and then trance your fingers along the sides of her waist and down her thighs. Spend some time on these areas before moving on to the vulva. Remember — no rush, nowhere to go. If she responds well, spend another minute or two running your fingers along her thighs.
Tips For A Mind-Blowing Pussy Massage
- Be mindful of your hands. Don't get lost in the movements. Be aware of how much pressure you are applying and every sensation as you explore her body.
- Keep the area lubed up! A dry pussy is not a nice pussy. Always purchase high-quality water-based lubricants for use inside the anus and vagina; coconut or olive oil is fine for massaging the body.
- Alternate speed, intensity, and pressure according to how she responds. You must learn to read body language and communicate with your partner because you probably aren't hitting the right spots if she's lying there as stiff as a board. Ask her what she likes or keep exploring until she squirms, moans, and asks for more.
- Lastly, save the clit for last. It's tempting, so we have to say it more than once. The clit is only dessert; the entire pussy is the 5-course meal. Massage her full body and vulva before working your way to the clit.
Massage her body then vulva
Start with the vulva to get her warmed up, excited, and wet. The vulva is the whole area between her legs, including the two lips (labia majora and labia minora). Most guys will toss it aside and go straight for the clit and vagina. As tempting as it may be, save the clit for last. Your finger should not enter her vagina until the very last moment when she’s starting to shake, squirm, and beg you to enter her.
There are multiple methods for massaging the vulva; here are the three best ones. Suppose you’re interested in learning about the other six highly effective methods. In that case, we highly suggest you enroll in the Best She’s Ever Had online course, where you’ll get the quality sex education you have dreamed of since high school. You’ll learn not only how to give a pussy massage but have access to countless video tutorials on anal, oral, threesomes, and more.
Method 1: The Illuminati
Form the Illuminati symbol, a triangle, with your two hands. Place the tips of your pointer fingers at the top of her pussy then allow your two thumbs to move up and downwards, massing the labia majora and minora (the two lips).
Method 2: The Copy Slider
You want a well-lubed-up hand for this one. Lay one hand flat against her vulva. Slide the hand upwards from the vaginal opening and continue up her stomach. Bring your hands back down from the stomach, sliding your hand over the entire vulva.
We call this the Copy Slider because your hand's movement mimics a piece of paper going through a copy machine.
Method 3: The Two Prong
You'll need two hands for this one. Place one hand at the top of her pubic bone (the flat area above the vagina), then use two fingers from that hand to gently open the labia majora (the outer lips).
Use the other hand's middle and index finger. Slightly separate the two fingers so that they mimic a two-prong power cord then gently glide over her exposed labia minora (the inner lips).
Save the clit for last
Think of the clit as dessert. It’s the best part of the meal, but you gotta wait for it. Don’t even think about or consider touching the clit until you’ve spent a lot of time massaging her body and entire vulva. You want to build up anticipation and get her super ready for intercourse. You’ll not going to accomplish this if you go straight for the clit, the most sensitive part of her body.
Start off slow with the clit, rubbing in circular motion. A lot of women need more intense stimulation for clitoral orgasms, so allow her to guide your fingers. Ensure the area is properly lubed up either with your favorite brand of water-based lubricant or her natural lubricant from inside her vagina.
Finally, get in there!
We call this the Inner Circle. With one finger, only slightly enter her vagina. Use the soft underside of your fingertips to rub her vaginal opening in a circular motion. Wait for her to get closer to you or beg you to put it in deeper. Make her way until she’s screaming and pleading with you to go deeper.
Once enough anticipation has been built, enter your finger deeper into her vagina until you reach the G-Spot. The Legendary G-Spot is only a knuckle and a half from the entrance and is on the upper wall. You’ll know you’ve found the G-Spot because it will be bumpy and ridgy. The area will swell the more aroused she becomes, so after that glorious pussy massage, it should be the size of an Olympic stadium.
The trick to the G-Spot is determining how much pressure your partner needs. The area can become very sensitive, but that doesn’t mean you’ll break it or her. Start slow but slowly add more pressure and pull harder on the spot. Stop if she seems uncomfortable, but if she doesn’t, keep increasing the intensity.
- For Added Pleasure: Purchase a G-Spot Vibrator, a sex toy, that will stimulate the G-Spot.
- For More Sensitive Ladies: Massage the G-Spot by lightly pulling your finger back towards yourself in a 'come here' motion. Alternate between that and rubbing in a circular motion.
- For Women That Need More: Pull your finger upward and towards yourself. Some women like enough strength to pull their pelvis off the bed, so add some effort and move your finger! If your partner likes having her G-Spot stimulated but can never seem to orgasm from your touch, it may be because you're too gentle.
Do Not Do THIS!
Once you fully enter her pussy, you want to explore it like it’s your first time touching a woman again. Get one or two fingers inside and feel around until you find her sweet spot. At the same time, avoid thrusting your finger in and out. Your finger is not a mini-dick, so moving it in and out will not have the same effect and, in most cases, does not feel like anything to most women. You’re wasting your time!
Don’t be a one-trick pony. Your partner has several other spots deeper in the vagina. We’ve already discussed her other vaginal spots in depth. You must learn her spots if you genuinely want to give your partner a mind-blowing experience! After stimulating the G-Spot, move deeper into the vagina to find her A-Spot, Internal C-Spot, and D-Spot. Ideally, she will already know what she likes. In reality, many women do not fully understand their sexuality and have concrete likes and dislikes. Therefore, why not explore her spots with her, helping her understand her sexuality? It’ll be a good night for you both.
Dying to learn more and give your partner the best sexual experience of her life but aren’t sure where to get started? You can access our free online resources, hear from other guys on our online forum, read the Best She’s Ever Had, a best-selling book on Amazon, or invest further into your sex life by joining one of our exclusive 5-Day retreats and online academies.
