Confidence is everything – whether that be in the boardroom or the bedroom. It doesn’t matter if you are too tall, too short, too bald, too fat, too thin, too broke, too weird, or too whatever – confidence is everything.
Sure, if you are totally out of shape, you could allow that to ruin your confidence, but it doesn’t have to — if you don’t allow it.
I have seen plenty of ugly, fat, short guys sleep with beautiful women simply because they had that one elusive characteristic – confidence.
The place where you want to get in life is to not care what other people think about you. Why? Because if you are going to be confident in life, you can’t – you can’t care what others think too much. So, stop caring so much about what people think about you, even your woman.
That doesn’t mean that you should be a jerk – it simply means that you approve and like yourself and no one is going to take that away from you.
In general, being more confident has an unlimited amount of benefits, and every man should continually work on his confidence. The more confident you are, the better you’ll feel about yourself and the more you’ll get out of life and love.
Here are some things you can do that will boost both your life and bedroom confidence levels significantly – in a totally natural way (so no affirmations and that kind of stuff – just real stuff that gives you the kind of natural confidence that makes women jump you and men respect you).
Confidence-Booster #1: Performing Like a Pro.
As I have discussed before, lasting longer will boost your confidence tremendously. I have written quite a bit about this already, and this is an integral part of the whole equation.
If you suffer from premature ejaculation (most men are not able to last longer than 15 minutes), then this one thing can shatter your confidence. Especially when you know that you’re not doing as well as you should in bed.
Just by learning this one simple skill, you could instantly boost your confidence. Knowing that women can’t get enough of you and that you are way better than their past lovers.
Lasting longer is like a self-fulfilling prophesy – when you last longer, you become more confident. When you become more confident, you can last longer.
Confidence-Booster #2: Feeling and Looking Like You Should.
Whether you are just starting out, or have been working out regularly for a decade, you have to get and stay in shape. Knowing that you look good, and feel good in your body – plus the attention and compliments you’ll get from women, these are things that immediately make you more confident. When you are satisfied with your own body, you’ll instantly be more attractive to women and ooze better energy to everyone around you.
Don’t let age get in your way either. There are guys who stay in shape and who can perform well into their 80s and beyond. Stay fit, stay active, and most importantly, work out.
Working out regularly also makes you have more energy and eliminate stress, that alone already makes you feel more in control of your life. And control equals confidence.
Confidence-Booster #3: Where Are You Going, And Why.
Women love a confident man. The place where you want to be with her is that you know and approve of yourself, you have a mission in life, know what it is, and that you’re going to accomplish your goals and mission with or without her.
Now, I would never recommend that you flat out tell her this. Don’t do that because she will be offended. But let it be true to you. You may think that it will turn her off, but in fact, she is hard-wired and programmed to follow a leader.
So be that leader. She will respect you more for it, and your confidence will shoot through the roof. Be passionate about your work or your goals. Have a purpose. Decide what you want to accomplish and go for it. Don’t just wish, but take decisive action towards accomplishing that goal. When you have a purpose and a big goal in front of you, you’ll get a lot more done. And results are what will make you more confident about everything.
Nothing can make you more confident than taking action and getting results. Little by little, you’ll know that any problem which comes your way is something that you can solve. And the more problems you successfully solve, the more confident you’ll be and the easier life will become.
I know it sounds strange, but even a thing like this will make you a better lover. Since sex is mostly a mental thing, when you are more attractive in general – outside of the bedroom, this also makes you more attractive (psychologically) and a bigger turn on for her inside the bedroom.
Confidence-Booster #4: How You Get to Carnegie Hall.
Having a lot of action in the bedroom and getting a lot of practice in it will boost your confidence too. So, have as much of it as you can. The thing that counts is your level of experience. And the only way to get more experience is to get more practice (with more women).
Faking it can also work, to some extent, but at the end of the day, nothing beats real-world experience. Along the way, you’ll make mistakes and you’ll learn from them. So that’s a good thing. Typically, the biggest mistake you make is getting lazy and not working on yourself, or taking your woman for granted. This is what makes you perform poorly and also lose your confidence in the bedroom.
Confidence-Booster #5: Communicating, For Real.
A confident guy is not afraid to be open and communicative – even about things in bed.
When you are open, you let your woman know what you really want, and you let her know what you don’t want to. Don’t be afraid to tell her the truth, but do it in a way that is not condescending or mean of course. This also means finding out what she wants and being totally cool with whatever that is.
Being communicative doesn’t just apply to verbal communication. Being communicative also means learning to read her body in bed so that you can satisfy her in the best way possible.
Being communicative means being aware of her emotions, reading her, and giving her what she wants.
But here is where women are really fickle. Sometimes, they just want to have a good shag without any talk – without any discussion. That’s where learning to read her body language.
Either way, when you open up a bit and tell her what you like, she can also relax a bit more and tell her what she likes without being afraid of being judged. Then once she tells you what she enjoys, it’ll be a lot easier to make her happy without wondering what you’re doing. So don’t be afraid to open op. The more open you are (from the start) the faster you’ll adapt to her unique desires and the better your results will be in the bedroom. So, getting to know each other and understanding her better will naturally make you feel more confident – since you’ll actually know what you’re doing.
Confidence-Booster #6: Understanding the Truth About Women.
Confident men in the bedroom understand women. They know that in reality and a lot of the time, women don’t even know what they want. They understand that women are hard-wired to be led by the guy. They are hard-wired, usually, to be submissive.
This is why so many women love a dominant guy that’s more “manly” and “macho” – basically, a guy that knows what he wants and goes for it. Also, a guy that isn’t too timid and too afraid of hurting her feelings. It’s not that you need to be a bad guy, it’s just that you shouldn’t put her in a position where you are waiting for her to make all the moves and decisions.
At the same time, other women fantasize and love the thought of finding romance, and having a knight in shining armor sweep them off their feet.
When you understand this duality in them, you can learn to use it to your advantage. Why? Because the more accurately you read her, the more confident you will be to rock her world in bed.
So, when you understand the conflicting nature of women, you are ahead of 99.9% of the other men out there. And that, my friend, will give you real confidence.
Confidence-Booster #7: Embracing Your Inner Alpha Male.
I have sort of eluded to this already, but when you embrace that alpha male part of yourself, you will gain a lot more confidence.
The alpha male is a leader. He is strong. He is dominant. In the eyes of a woman, he is very attractive because she is naturally drawn to the strong, confident, tough-guy type.
This is why nice guys usually don’t fare well – they are seen as insecure, weak, and pathetic in a woman’s mind, typically.
So, embrace that alpha male part of yourself and you will automatically raise your confidence.
Confidence-Booster #8: Meditating Like a Zen Master.
It may seem like a contradiction to go from advising you to be an alpha male to doing meditation, but nothing could be further from the truth.
Meditation is not just for hippies – it is for alpha males – all males. When a person meditates, the beta waves are the high vibrational frequencies. When you learn to calm the babble of thoughts in your mind, you then vibrate at the alpha wave level. Beta males, just like beta waves are chaotic, frantic, insecure, and emanate the feeling of stress. The alpha males, like the alpha waves, are calmer, lower frequency, secure, and peaceful.
This is why one of the best examples of an alpha male who gets all the girls is James Bond. He never gets frantic, insecure, or stressed-out no matter what is going on. He remains calm, cool, and collected no matter what.
How do you get there? Meditation. What is the best way? That is a totally personal thing. There are many variations of meditation such as Qigong Meditation, Open Awareness Meditation, Compassion Meditation, Guided Meditation, Mindfulness Meditation, and more.
If you want a free and easy way to meditate, look up meditation on YouTube and see which one resonates with you the most. The point is that meditation can clear your mind and give you more control over your life. And more control makes you feel like you have both feet on the ground and like you can actually influence what’s happening in your life instead of just being another spectator.
These are just some of the things you can do to instantly supercharge your confidence levels both in life and your relationship. And once you’re more confident, you have a lot less to worry about too. Like, you’ll never have to worry about infidelity or her losing interest in you, because women are drawn like a magnet to men with real, natural confidence.